A few years back, I was captivated by the legend[1] of Sati and Siva and the brief tale that follows is based on the same. I have done little other than to remove wonderful details in the name of simplicity and there might be some details included which are ‘proceeding from the heat oppressed brain’, as the Bard would put it. If you spot levity, please bear with that congenital handicap of mine.
Sati and Siva – Love and Frailty
It was the glorious age after the fall of Man when the gods had to think about creation. And it was not an easy matter (then or now) to bring together the two best candidates.
Brahma had to compel Daksha to give his daughter Sati in marriage to Siva, the Great God and ascetic. Sati herself was the reincarnation of the Great Goddess. She became Daksha’s daughter on one condition: ‘if ever in future Daksha should show her less respect, she would cast off her body and withdraw into her inmost self, or take up another shape’. Pre-conditions always return to hurt. But, that pre-condition is not part of this tale.
Brahma was fortunate to find in Sati a willing accomplice in the plot to domesticate the ascetic. From a young age, Sati was devoted to Siva. To conquer the Supreme Ascetic, she became an ascetic. With severe austerities, her intention was not to withdraw herself but rather to draw Siva to herself.
Brahma did not consider himself fortunate with the entrusted task of convincing Siva that his time is up and Brahma nearly cried,
“For God’s sake, you just cannot continue like this – every man has to marry, all the other gods have done so and they cannot let you go free!”
Siva, stroking his blue neck, was actually confused. Just the thought of marriage added a few creases to that fair handsome face. He knew of Sati, of course. Which guy would not know the girl in the neighbourhood especially one like Sati, the dark beautiful enchanting devoted Uma. But,
“Me married? I need freedom not bondage. I am neither here nor there, I have Yoga. What use do I have for a loving wife?”
But then, he thought of his devotees,
“They need it – for them, it would be meaningful.”
He kept stroking his blue neck, possibly feeling choked with the thought of what lies ahead. He thought a great deal more and then he made the common request of prospective bridegrooms,
“She must work (and, be a Yogini) when I work (that is, when I practice Yoga) and of course…” shrugging slightly and smiling a little, “she must be a loving woman when I indulge in love.”
Brahma gave the clichéd huge sigh of relief.
“Hold on…” Siva said.
“Oh…oh!” Brahma thought “Here it comes…the demands…”
Then Siva demanded for that which no man before or since that day has ever asked,
“The day she doubts my words, I will abandon her.”
Another set of pre-conditions! Brahma agreed with Siva’s demand but he did not think that it would be a good idea to share that with Sati.
What’s the next scene? The guy had to meet the girl, of course. Siva interrupted Sati’s intense meditation and asked her,
“Girl, what do you want?”
It was the glorious age when the girl stammered and stuttered. Siva understood what she was trying to say and granted himself to her. She found her voice then and said, like most decent girls,
“You have to ask my father, you know?”
“I know.” Siva replied with a smile.
Well, there were the usual “Are you good enough for my daughter?” kind of looks from Daksha but Siva was not a proposal you could refuse, as the Godfather might say.
The wedding happened, Siva and Sati ‘knotted’ and all that. One helluva couple, everyone blessed!
It was tough for Siva to live that life of contradiction, a husband and an ascetic. But only He could do so. He loved her like no man has loved a woman before or after that time – emotional, physical, erotic, spiritual, gentle, playful, understanding, trusting, respecting – and, Sati reciprocated with equal fervour. Siva told her stories, played games and tried to share with his life-partner his philosophy, his experiences and his mission in life.
The honeymoon period got over and it was quite natural that Sati expressed her discontent once or twice. She was not really comfortable with his ways and thoughts, especially about maya and all that. Then, his abode was not exactly cool; rather cold, wet and unsheltered, wasn’t it?
Spring turned into summer and on of one those hot days, while they were taking a stroll in the forest, they came across Rama who was searching for Sita.
Siva recognized Rama and Siva bowed – after all, it was Siva who crowned Lord Vishnu as the Lord Of The Universe.
But, for Sati, Siva was The Lord and she wondered why her lord should bow to this strange man. She asked Siva,
“Why are YOU bowing to him?”
“He is Rama.” Siva replied curtly hoping that Sati would take the hint and shut up – for their sake.
“Who? That guy? Surely, you are joking…”
Siva leaned against a tree, tired and spent, defeated and devastated. For the last time, he gave her a loving look. But, in that bright light, Sati did not catch the change in his expression. She persisted,
“Come on…tell me, won’t you…he can’t be Rama?”
“He is. He is searching for Sita, the woman he loves dearly.”
“Let me test that.”
With that she left him. Sati disguised herself as Sita and approached Rama,
“Rama! You have found me, your Sita!”
Rama, with a small smile entering his sad eyes, greeted her,
“O Sati – stop fooling around!”
Sati realized her blunder, blushed (it was a cliché even then) and rushed back to Siva, hiding her face against his body, in shame.
“Why did I doubt your words, my Love, my Lord?”
Siva caressed her hair. He could not speak. How he wanted to get over this with a consoling “Never mind, my Love.” But, that’s for mere mortals like you and me. He could not.
That’s where the tale ended for me.
But, the nightmares started then – my thoughts about the pain Siva had to endure. He had to stick to what he had told Brahma. He had to abandon her. The day Sati doubted Siva, Siva had to abandon his love for her. But, he was still there with her pretending to be the same man, telling the same stories, playing the same games, acting the husband’s role. But he was never there – really with her.
I do not know whether Sati sensed the Great God’s act. But, He is the Supreme Actor – he who guides us with the contradiction of maya and truth.
But I was worried about Siva…
Imagine this man – quite well-set in his bachelor ways and with immense responsibilities. Agreed that he expressed common doubts about marriage but once he was in, he was definitely in, the best husband a woman could want. Then, he faces the two big blows.
First, the minor blow, his wife doubts him – the breakdown of trust and respect. Every modern counselor knows that you can talk about mending bridges, but the damage caused by doubt is to the foundation and the collapse is imminent.
Second, he lives with her pretending to be the same husband – seemingly unaffected. He knows that the edifice is crumbling. Just imagine his agony. Imagine him lying next to the woman he cannot love any more in the current form. It is cruel – that act till the end.
O Siva!
Author’s note: So, that’s the tale which haunts me. At times, it seems like reality.
Now, let’s leave that. It’s unlikely that I will try to write about religion or mythology in the near future and so, let me try another kind of teaser.
My Q & Your A
Finally, let me leave you with an exercise. Kindly read the prayer and the passages that follow the prayer. I will leave a question at the end.
A common man’s prayer (you may delete the lines with names[2]):
Vigneswara! Hold my hand, To write, To live; Sri Rama! You knew: To rule All of the people All of the time; About – Niti and Nyaya; Sita; A life Without A break; Sita knew: You, Your duty, Your love; We killed Sita, Wish we knew; Sri Krishna! I held your hand, That with butter; When I am weak, Tired, defeated, I let go, I forget You never let go; You had to leave Her and nearly all, You left a mystery To misunderstand, I can only try To touch your feet With my head, Try to be Arjun Till desolate death; Primal – MahaDeva! Father, The Man; MahaDevi! Mother, The Woman; Seeking – a son.
In an old notebook, I found the following two passages (I think it is from the ‘Life and Teachings of Narayana Guru’ by Nataraja Guru):
1. Whichever the religion It suffices If it makes a better man. 2. A man’s religion is a matter of his personal conviction…Each man, therefore, may be supposed to belong to a different religion, and no two people belong to the same religion. On the other hand, all the religions of the world agree in spirit, the most essential part of religion. All religions represent values of Truth or Duty.
I have been a fanatic, an agnostic, an atheist – when I thought I knew. I found that life is simpler without that thought.
My question:
Did you need to ‘believe in a particular religion’ to read that?
If your answer is yes, I failed.
And, I shall try to pray better next time.
BACK TO POST [1] I have not read the Siva Purana. I remember reading about the original story in ‘Siva: the Siva Purana Retold’ by Ramesh Menon and ‘The Presence of Siva’ by Stella Kramrisch. In fact, I have not even read these books completely. I have also plagiarized ‘frailty’ from the section titled ‘Sati’s Frailty’ (page 310) in Kramrisch’s book.
BACK TO POST [2] To those who are unfamiliar with the characters involved, try Google/Bing to get an idea about the names but are the stories really necessary?
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