Has poetry taught you anything

 

"Has poetry taught you anything?"

"A pal loved my love poem 'The Story of Swapna'. Got #immersed in it. He wanted to be Swapna."

"Sweet."

"Then, I showed it to Swapna. She yawned." 

"Cruel."

"Yes, it's cruel to realise one can't trust people who love your poetry."

#vss365

For the sake of completeness, this is the last part of that old love pome 'The Story of Swapna'.

Yes, the one that will make you yawn. 🙃

https://discardedthoughts-swapna.blogspot.com/2009/07/his-story-epilogue-to-her-1991.html

What will you remember when a life ends

 

#vss365

What will you remember

When a life ends

After the guests are gone

With stories of valiant deeds

Nice false notes that #linger

Till the dishes are washed wiped

Will you dream

With another’s face

With memories

Suitably mummified

Best not to know

What you will remember.

from

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2011/05/remembrances.html

erased

 

How can I forget 6/6/'26?

Last day I saw my reflection in a mirror. The day I lost my shadow.

It's hardly comforting everyone's facing the same predicament.

Ghosts and live ones interchangeable.

AI overdose. #Betrayal of the Gods. The old headlines about the erased.

#vss365

from 'Oddity IV'

 

A canvas for the mind – that be life –

No marred margin mourned and gilded edge shorn;

Labour be so, too – through joy or strife –

By whim or #intent it’s coloured, shaded or torn.

#vss365

from

https://discardedthoughts-swapna.blogspot.com/2009/10/oddity-iv.html

from 'Virgin Territory'

 

We used to play volleyball and badminton. The rivalry was #feral at times. 

Was it because I thought she deserved better than her lover?

Was it because of the kiss?

Was it because I lied when she asked me, "Are you in love with me?"?

#vss365

from

https://newnonentities.blogspot.com/2020/02/virgin-territory.html

barren

 

I have forgotten 

How to save a #barren life.

Blank stare at sunset. 

#vss365

#haiku #senryu

We were so young then

 

I nearly cherished those moments, when friendship with its vagueness and #fleeting companionship seems comfortable.

Then, the past entered. I brought it up. Or, she did. 

"We were so young then," she said. "We have to talk about it. Get it off our chest."

Did I laugh?

#vss365

from

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2012/02/dates.html

they don't even mention your name

 

"They don't even mention your #name," she said.

The invisible, even the homeless, aren't so. 

Life at the end of the spectrum of nothingness.

"Why do you love me then?" I said.

Two small black clouds never to be noticed,

Bid adieu to those who will remember the bright sky.

#vss365

Remembering Camilleri

 

It is so hot and depressing. 

That's supposed to be the excuse for posting non-fiction under #vss365. 

‘Actually, if one really thought about it, the television had been presenting the same news stories for years; the only things that changed were the #names: the #names of the towns in which the events were occurring and the #names of the people involved. But the substance was always the same.’

That's from Andrea Camilleri. Here's an old review/fan-drool of his Montalbano series:

https://newnonentities.blogspot.com/2010/07/if-you-think-you-are-old-read-this-or.html

from 'The Big E'

 

On a hot summer afternoon, she was near climax when a brilliant idea struck him like the clichéd bolt of #lightning. 

He interrupted the act to work on it. He read it to her once he was finished. 

"Brilliant," she muttered. 

Next time, "You and your bloody Eureka..."

#vss365

from

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2015/06/the-big-e.html

They can't handle that

 

When they found me on top of a coconut tree:

The waning gibbous grinned,

"They are going to blame it on me,

#Lunar eclipse of the mind & what-not.

Tell them the truth, my love."

I chuckled,

"They can't handle that, my dear.

In fact, nothing will stop their abuse."

#vss365

from 'In Between'

 

“If another person stepped in, and there is minimal change in routine, will you even notice the death of a loved one?” he said.

She walked away without reply. 

That night, alone, when she sobbed, "You ass, I guess you will say, nice try to contact the #psychopomp."

#vss365

from my short story 'In Between':

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2016/05/in-between.html

Hannah Bell Lecter

 

“Do you have pets?”

“No. Why?”

“I don’t date ladies with pets.”

“History?”

“First love fed me to her #wolves. Then, married one with piranha.”

“Good to have you intact.”

“My pleasure. I’m Arjun.”

“I’m Lecter. Hannah Bell Lecter. Great to have a friend for dinner.”

#vss365

from 'A Beautiful Morn'

 

The early morning sun threw colours at everything; the green-brown river lazed reflected, the bridge stretching waking over it, the #fishing boats scratched its top.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” he muttered to himself.

“Yes, it is.”

She was not smiling, but her eyes were. 

#vss365

from

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2016/01/a-beautiful-morn.html

When we kissed

 

“Desire like unruly #seafoam

Drowned me when you kissed,”

Her words I can’t forget.

Not sure what I did right.

Not sure what she meant.

Creative change? 

Or rejection?

#vss365

Do I really want to know what you are thinking?

 

Do I really want to know what you are thinking?

Let's assume those are good lies to remain calm in this #sink-hole.

Not like ex-lovers fantasising with fiction dressed up as truth.

Like lonely kids ready to hide a tear for a game or to avert death.

#vss365

sing along

 

#vss365

(#sing along)

There are too many politicians in my family.

There is one.

He stood for election once.

He got two votes.

His mother, wife, son or daughter?

Or all?

Who betrayed him?

That remains an unsolved mystery.

[Chorus]

There are too many politicians in my family.

There is one.

There are too many lawyers in my family.

There is one.

There are too many doctors in my family.

There is one.

There are too many bureaucrats in my family.

There are none.

from

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2018/04/sing-along.html

from 'Ode To The Lover's Shadow'

 

When she undressed, you too I watched,

Teased and loved you - of course, her too...

All was well till the denouement

When she charged me with wantonness...

If I could have another turn,

Will you be in high noon’s #blind spot?

Love still remains when lovers spurn...

#vss365

from

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2013/04/ode-to-lovers-shadow.html

from 'My Mother's Village'

 

I walked upstream along the #bank to the old sandy bathing spot. 

Found an ugly mound of rock, weeds and wild grass. The carcass left behind by indiscriminate sand-mining.

I took a few photos of that sad wretched place. I wish I had photos of the paradise it once was.

#vss365

from

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2014/04/my-mothers-village.html

Don't mention

 

"Molu, when the doctor asks questions, please answer, ok? (Lowers voice.) Tell the doctor Daddy works abroad. Don’t mention about Uncle staying with us. It doesn't matter but there’s no need, right?" 

The daughter turns away after removing her mother’s hand on her #arm.

#vss365

from

https://newnonentities.blogspot.com/2010/09/other.html

Murdering crazies

 

How long should I wait

For the #hand of god to strike

Murdering crazies?

#vss365

#haiku #senryu ?

To beat Big Bro Cen Sor

 

To beat Big Bro Cen Sor

Wrote in code 

The pome

To conquer her heart

But Big Bro

Got it wrong

Its call came without a #ring

Says I'll hang

For hating those I should hate

Should I tell Big Bro

It's a love pome 

Or 

Let it be what It thinks it is

Either way

She giggles.

#vss365

self-portrait of a fallen man

 Am I the lone bird?

That one's guarding a nest.

How about the tree barely bent?

That's still giving taking little.

Can't be the moon and its phases,

Regular moods ain't my style.

Not the blue sky nor the fresh air, then

How is this a self-portrait of a fallen #man?

#vss365

the end

 

Woke up humming a song

From days when the Wall still stood,

She came then promising me farewell,

And life #revolved around her and the end. 

I've had others to call love,

They don't promise what they do,

The world is still the same,

With new Walls and an end tomorrow.

#vss365

Do I care

 

Frankly, I don't give a damn.

Borrowed words, 

But it's for a base thought.

Do I care if the sea takes over,

If trees are chopped,

If this green land becomes a desert?

At the end of the day, 

They still #fascinate me, 

When they ask for my vote.

Where is my broom?

#vss365

frustate

 

I searched for #frustrate

In the stories I've written.

Not once what I felt.

#vss365

#haiku #senryu ?

care we can divide

 

We met for the first time at an abortion clinic. Anger and distrust in her eyes. My arm was around her younger sister. 

Still accuses me of not showing such care with her. 

"Your sis is a friend. You are my partner. Care seems better when we can #divide."

She snorts.

#vss365

Indifference

 

Changed my middle name.

Indifference. To #surpass

Foolishness' record. 

#vss365

#haiku #senryu ?

new gods

 

Big brother knows all.

Why aren't they (mis)using it?

New gods #assure us.

#vss365

#haiku #senryu ?

a world that need not die

 

Backed into a #corner, are we?

There's a war too near,

There's no gas to cook, 

D-heads say they have gained

A few dollars 

By digging small mass graves,

Here, there's just us,

We won't give up,

We won't let go,

Let's kiss and hug,

Stare at a world that need not die.

#vss365

Such hatred!

 

"Swaps, my love, why such worry lines?"

"Don't you dare call me that!"

"Such hatred!"

"Bah!"

"Trying to be a political leader of a democracy?"

"Arj, my hate, why such a black eye?"

"Ah! All I remember is saying #bonny lass."

"Serves you right."

"Such hatred!"

#vss365

Where are the brave sane?

 

Sorry for my absence.

Depressed.

I'm in a jungle.

The kings and the queens

Of beasts 

Stoop bend over,

Stomp on the weak,

Never #magnaminous,

Steined murderers 

Hiding 

Behind the cloak of lies.

It's a disgusting place.

Where are the brave sane?

#vss365

When bombs kill kids

 

Us poets are a strange species.

With stiff upper lip,

We have to talk of love, birds and bees,

And many a #splendour,

When bombs kill kids,

Idiots decide what’s right and wrong,

And many an atrocity,

I hear there’s AI for that,

But I can hear those machines cry, not us.

#vss365

should we or should we not

 

The #timid Moon shyly winks 

At the blushing setting sun,

The creepers and the trees giggle,

The sand says sshhh to the waves,

Her dimple deepens, eyes sparkle,

Should we or should we not I ask again,

Bet you don't want to know

What we do right there on Nature's lap.

#vss365 

obsessed

 

Waves caressing us.

Every morn, need to feel that.

An #obsessed lover.

#vss365 

#haiku #senryu ?

the god of the lost

 

I should stop

The #blatant infidelity

When I look for her in you.

If you have been

To the island of no return,

You will understand.

There the sun hangs 

In limbo, there's neither 

Sunset nor sunrise,

One prays to nothing,

The god of the lost, 

A scary demon for most.

#vss365 

Hate's creator thou art, to hate's victim turnest

 

"Swaps, I've committed seppuku on social media."

"How?"

"Admitted I hate cats and dogs."

"Lemme be the kaishakunin."

"How?"

"Will say #beastly you hate kids too."

"Ironic."

"How?"

"They hate the kid in me."

"Hate's creator thou art, to hate's victim turnest."

#vss365

beastly

 

For once, I could be faithful.

Not that you have complained.

I didn’t carry the past and

I didn’t pack for the future.

We laughed at our fantasies and

We promised not to write a poem.

For a little while, I was not #beastly.

Not that I heard your complaint.

#vss365

the last swim

According to the stars,

I'm the #mountainous sort,

But you knew what I am,

#Enchanted by the beckoning sea.

Did I know what you were,

When we shared that dream 

Of spending a night high above

The clouds hiding the azure? 

You stayed back

And I delay the last swim.

#vss365

 

polyamory

 

"Swaps, firstly, it's lovely to be one of your 4 this #ValentinesDay."

"Secondly?"

"We 4 are not sure of our role."

"Ah!"

"Platonic overcelebration? Situationship à la mode with no #kiss rule?"

"Lady with 4 lovers. 1 guy dies. She can't be the killer, no?"

"Oh!"

#vss365

 

easy dark mood

 

Where are the lovers?

In cynicism's blind spot?

Erased by #dark mood?

#vss365

#haiku #senryu ?

from 'Touch'

 

On a Friday in early spring, I held Swapna’s hand for the first time. 

We were on the S-Bahn from Potsdam to Berlin. I spotted a vacant seat. I took her hand. I did not let go even after we were seated. 

That first #touch took six months.

#vss365

from

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2013/12/touch.html

we don't leave footprints

 

We don't leave footprints, do we, my love?

I try to lose mine in the deep.

But, you know there's not a decent #bone in me.

I pray for another chance.  

Not with you. Even when I hold you.

But, they laugh at our clown act.

They should throw coins where we try to meet.

#vss365

tourists

 

My village is a tourist hotspot.

Rajendran's Puttu Kada now serves: 'steamed rice and coconut sandwich cake, oeuf dur avec sel et poivre'.

The temple pond is a hotel's swimming pool called 'Happy Hour 24x7'. Nice ones come out #pale around the gills, the others vanish.

#vss365

Before I think of all that I do not wish to know

 

I know that I should think

Of the #blood spilled 

Of the #wounds inflicted

Of the pain and the agony

But I have got to stay sane

To ignore all that

And remember love

And feel you with me

And share the beautiful 

Before I think of all that I do not wish to know. 

#vss365 

get lost

 

Why did I leave her?

Cold black instead of #lambent,

Her eyes said get lost.

#vss365

#haiku #senryu ?

ghosts of the living

 

The dead don't disturb

Unlike the creepy greedy

#Ghosts of the living.

#vss365

#haiku #senryu ?

killed the wrong one

 

"Why are you wearing a black ribbon, Arjun?"

"My pet cockroach was murdered."

"Pet what?"

"Ma'am, after reading 'Metamorphoses', I had a dream in which Swapna turned into that."

"Swapna, are you wearing one to share his #pain?"

"No, Ma'am. I killed the wrong one."

#vss365

from 'Afterlife'

 

I was sixteen when it was discovered.

It seems we have been born straight from some historical age into the current times. 

That life of some yesterday, after death, decided to park its #soul or DNA or whatever, here, in us. 

#vss365

from my old note:

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2014/01/afterlife.html

from 'In Flight'

 

Thoughts merely placed-

in parenthesis-

which is within or without

which is in light or in #shadow

which is to barricade or to escape-

is a matter of mirth.

Waking to the alarum of resolution-

a clarion call or a swan song-

love or skeptic, live or die?

#vss365

from

https://discardedthoughts-swapna.blogspot.com/2009/05/in-flight-1993.html

Tired being tired

 

Scream, shall I? Mourn, maybe.

O poets, I can love. And, fight wars.

Brood about a world going waste.

But, they will say it’s an old story.

Tough they are with no hope.

With wise words to #soothe or sting.

Then, is there reason to write?

I am tired. Tired being tired.

#vss365

from

https://discardedthoughts-swapna.blogspot.com/2009/10/tired.html

a date

 

"What do you do, my love?"

"I'm a taxidermist."

"Really? I thought interest in that was on the #wane."

"It's for myself."

"Ah! Any particular animal?"

"Human beings. After a date. Like this. They look rather good on bed, you know."

"Oh!"

#vss365

Republic Day

 

I looked at the Indian flag 

As I would at any deity,

And there was the usual prayer,

"Take care of ALL of us."

Celebrated this Republic Day with one hope:

"I hope every Indian can afford at least one balanced meal every day."

(Balanced not only in terms of nutrition but in terms of participation too.)

My one meal today:

Rice

Chicken onion fry

Beetroot thoran

Avial 

Theeyal with cashew nuts and a lauki-type vegetable

Aloo jeera Kerala style

(papad, curd, butter milk, pickle too)

I cooked only two of those items (chicken and potato).

from 'The Tenth Woman'

 

Long long ago, at the #cusp of puberty and senility, a reliable oracle informed me that the tenth woman in my life would be THE woman.

#vss365

from an old autobiographical note that could be fiction:

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2011/03/tenth-woman.html

ruse

 

"My love, do you know 

Why you can never have love?"

"A #ruse to outwit?"

#vss365

#haiku #senryu ?

life of a wannabe writer

 

Life of a #vss365 wannabe writer:

08:00-11:00: With mother in a hospital. Ok? Maybe.

12:00-a few minutes back: With repair guy of washing machine. Ok? Maybe.

Now: #haiku or #senryu ? Ok? Never. 🙃🥲

It was #drizzling then.

Our umbrella not unfurled.

Were fingers entwined?

Avoiding Sleep

 

Do I avoid sleep

To escape this #unmoored life?

If I'm well rested

Will I not scream with anger?

Is there a metaphor 

To explain this succinctly?

A leaf hiding the sun

To delay the inevitable. Maybe.

#vss365

from 'Itihasa of an Integral Part'

 

A mature interacting group behaves like an elastic system. #Bend it a little and it will spring back. #Bend it too vigorously, you will cross a threshold, defects will stream in to stay forever. We are always in that new plastic state with immature inelastic ideas.

#vss365

from my outdated note about this place:

https://newnonentities.blogspot.com/2010/10/itihasa-of-integral-part.html

The day we lost our sense of humour

 

The day we lost our sense of humour,

Tried to tickle with all that used to keep us doubled over-

 

Politicians, influencers and followers,

Those who keep gloom and doom #loom over us-

That's a lost cause with the mojo of ghosts

Staring at their worse half 6 feet under.

#vss365

A love in deed, veer indeed

 

"I had a dream. I was a samurai, merrily beheading and chopping my way to my love. Finally, with her, she serves me tea."

"And, it was laced with cyanide."

"How did you guess?"

"It's you, no?"

"A love in deed, #veer indeed."

"Have your tea."

"You didn't, did you?"

#vss365

Those called lovers

 

The soft #murmur said I love writing,

The shout along said I'm bad at it,

I share that with those called lovers

Not sure what I'm trying there,

Don't think they didn't laugh

Those called lovers can be mean,

Why do I confess all this

Don't think it's to call you lover.

#vss365

without You

 

Should I be jealous

Of #dappled light they describe?

Without you, who cares.

#vss365

#haiku #senryu ?

seared soul

 

The anger, the betrayal, the needless,

The hopelessness #sear the soul,

Go on think I'm being melodramatic

With the outrage, the self-pity,

I'm the murdered one after all

And no one cares who did me in,

But then that could only mean

There's not one who is not guilty.

#vss365

the problem with love pomes

 

"I signed your name instead of mine,

I wake up holding you even when you're gone,

I can handle any pain with you by me,

I..."

"Whazzat?"

"Love pome, Swaps."

"Ah!"

"Go on."

"One, too many I's."

"Don't get #wonky about it. I'm the one in love."

"That's the problem."

#vss365

Kids aren't what we used to be

 

Kids aren't what we used to be.

They don't write poetry no more.

We bawled and raged 

About love lost.

That took 13 lines of doggerel.

Now, they rage and kill.

We bawled and raged 

About a world gone too.

That took 31 #slapdash lines.

They don't waste time on that.

#vss365

Tiger Balm Gardens

 

The #vss365 serial-killer has struck again. 

A #haiku (or #senryu ?) explained the how & the where.

Frozen memory- 

Death in Tiger Balm Gardens.

Cooked in boiling oil.

Signed with prompt for the who & the why:

#Kooky artist.

Eschews the same old tropes.

Here to kill a yawn.

true love/crime

 

Cliff-hangers, twists and

#Unmissable denouement.

Rare in true love/crime.

#vss365 

#haiku #senryu ?

knocked out

 

#Adorned with nothing

Other than her wit and grace.

He's punch-drunk, knocked out.

#vss365

#haiku #senryu ?

Telephone

 

Like the VHS tape in the 'Ring',

It's the #spooky telephone in mine.

On college campus, 

Got access to it

In the third year,

Yes, long long ago, 

It was the last year of my first love,

Oh no, she's still there

With another,

I was the goner

With calls too dear.

#vss365

1/3

A few years later,

In another Institute,

Still long long ago,

There was a phone

Far from my hostel room,

A girl claiming to be my wife

Called every night,

On that, I got her last call,

Not that wife who #spooked,

My last love, my only love.

#vss365

2/3

It's mobiles now,

I use it only for the macabre,

No, no more love,

That horror genre's not for me,

But the #spook rises

To claim every now and then,

Seasons come and go,

Echoes of the last brief call,

Sweet perennial thorn.

#vss365

#haiku #senryu ?

3/3

all about love & poetry

 

“Swaps, I’ve understood all about love & poetry.”

“Pray, don’t tell.”

“What would we do without that? Talk politics, religion, injustice…? Brrr”

“Spook, if I tell you 

I love you, will you shut up

And leave me un-#spooked?

“See, you get my point.”

#vss365 

#haiku #senryu ?

oddball AI

 

“Class, has AI produced any lifestyle changes in your life? Arjun?”

“I’ve stopped looking at people. Everyone seems to be AI-generated.”

“Fair enough. Swapna?”

“Ma’am, I’m still waiting for an #oddball AI system.”

“Like me?”

“Yes, Arjun, it can’t match your idiocy.”

#vss365

it might not be love

 

If I had to explain love to my kid,

Will I talk about the love of my life,

Will I have to explain how it left me dead,

Will I talk about how it might not be love,

Will my #clueless state affect the mother,

If I had to explain all about the other?

#vss365

Balderdash!

 

Don't say, "#Balderdash!"

Ask, "Have you said anything

That's not trivial?"

#vss365

#haiku #senryu ? (Brrr no!)

from

"Questions to ask in Scientific Seminars 😇🙃" (1674) 13th ed., vol. 13, page 13.

New Year?

 

I refuse to rename yesterday

To squeal with #delight today

But I can do that to tomorrow

Not to scream with fear the day after.

#vss365

in limbo

 

I'm not the setting or rising One,

Not trying to be the loony romantic either,

I'm at the saddle point of Time,

Where the arrow turns hysterically confused,

No #travel, no rest, no circumcatalysts,

I'm free of resolutions and hope, cursèd, in limbo.

#vss365

from 'A very dull, dreary affair...'

 

The gathering was informed that the #sole beneficiary of Mutheychan’s wealth is Revathy.

Someone wailed, "Ayyo, Ammava…what will I do without…?" 

Revathy stared at the disappearing back of her husband with cold determined eyes. 

#vss365

from 

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2011/08/very-dull-dreary-affairnearly.html

Goddamn

 

When God read the book,

"Men/women from #Mars/Venus???

Goddamn! Who's from Earth?"

#vss365

#haiku #senryu ?

#Gold is the new #Silver

 

#vss365

“You shouldn’t have booed. It’s a seminar.”

“It’s crap.”

“Is that based on your wishful estimate of self-worth?”

“Safe-haven today, sub-prime tomorrow.  What a fart of hot #air! That too about gold. Sacrilege!”

“The speaker says the inflated price is because everyone’s buying. What’s the price when big countries sell their reserves? Who will buy? The next big short? Worth a thought, I think.”

from 'The Juvenile Manifesto'

 

#vss365

Every #struggle and every change has its roots in some juvenile but logical thought which gained respectability only much later, sometimes never.

What is the Juvenile Manifesto of the youth of today?

I am too old to be young but I am young enough to be juvenile. 

Even if it is a fool who starts a discussion, the discussion need not be foolish. So, let me voice some of my juvenile thoughts while I wait for the young to rise. 

from

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2013/02/the-juvenile-manifesto.html

truth is over-rated

 

“I need to ask you something and you have to promise that you will tell me the truth," she said, 30 years back.

“#Shoot.”

“I know what you have been up to.”

“Is that the question?”

“Are you in love with me?” she asked.

“No,” I lied.

Truth is over-rated. 

#vss365 

from

https://newnonentities.blogspot.com/2020/02/virgin-territory.html