deviant behaviour

 

#vss365 (ok, it's not very short)

"Is this the little kid I carried?" she sounded just like Topol in 'Fiddler on the Roof'.

"How now brown cow?"

"This is not the time for Benny Hill," she shifted to Michael Corleone.

"Okie. Wassup?"

"My kid's in love."

"That’s lovely."

"And having sex."

"Come on, that’s better than depression and loneliness."

"That's #deviant. It should be banned outside marriage."

"Why should parents spend lots on a wedding for people to have sex?"

"That’s a parent's right. Eeew! Thinking about it gives me the creeps."

"Move with the times. Who is the lucky one?"

"Your kid."

"What the hell! Yuck! How can they? We should get them married."

"They are not interested."

"Tradition! Tra dee shon!" 

We did the wine-bottle dance to drown our sorrow in sweat and tears.

Isn't that what we do

 

How can I forget those times 

When you found comfort 

Lying on top of me

#Taffeta over plain old rag

I practised for such moments

The eyes, the touch, the words

There's no malice or deception

Isn't that what we do

To look good in any way

You too did well, my love

#vss365

serious business

 

Is that

a #cummerbund

or a tummy tucker,

and keds 

for a black-tie affair?

Is it all

for love,

desperate

distraught

disaster?

Be yourself,

Be free,

Or flee,

Don't slurp, 

Oh don't be you.

Jokes aside,

It's serious business,

Buy the asset,

Hedge well,

Trade or invest?

#vss365

Grave Masala

 

A 54-year-old billionaire says he committed 2 murders 39 years back.

He started as a tea-seller. We use his peculiar #masala in every dish, not just tea.

"Can't get enough bodies to make that," he apologizes.

Netizens have come out in support under the hashtag #UseMe.

#vss365

Swami

 

"Hardship is the #prism through which our light gets to show all its colours."

"Arj, stop!"

"Swaps, I have got 98 'thoughts'. Need one more."

"For what?"

"To be named Swami Arjunananda."

"If your thoughts can be numbered, so are your days."

"Ah!"

"Now, get lost."

#vss365

gone cuckoo

 

My shrink suggested a joint session. 

"Gone cuckoo?" I said.

The other entered the room saying, "Kids! Pets! Definitely the devil's work!"

It was love at first sound. One's #hamartia became a virtue.

No more sessions for us. Madly in love, the rest seems less crazy. 

#vss365

from 'The Woman'

 

She knew how to make him squirm. Shower him with praise.

She poked the dagger of attention at his Achilles #heel. Liberally sprinkled the salt of affection on that wound. Went on with her eulogy.

His visage resembled a fresco with scenes from Torquemada’s inquisition.

#vss365 

from an old short story of mine 'The Woman':

https://justoneavatar.blogspot.com/2015/07/the-woman.html